From: Emlyn O'Regan (emlyn@one.net.au)
Date: Fri Aug 18 2000 - 20:49:13 MDT
Amara wrote:
May I ask why the two of you wanted the same last name?
is the reason Symbolism.. Convenience.. something else?
Convenience mostly; Jodie didn't worry one way or the other, but I wanted us
all to have the same last name - it's an IT person thing I think, a
functionality concern; I wanted a decent top level identifier.
Seeing I was the one with the issue, I decided to take it apon myself to
solve it; so I changed my surname. It's worked out very well. Changing your
name, like getting rid of all your crap and moving somewhere with nothing,
is a very cleansing experience; highly recommended.
When I was married, my spouse and I chose to keep our own names.
I like my name and I have a long publication record with it,
however my ex didn't like his name, and changed both his first
and last names, 5 years into our relationship. We still found
though that the occassional stranger called him, Mr {my last name},
and less-often, me, Mrs. {his last name}.
Amara also wrote:
My name seems to fit all of criteria in your post, i.e.
>Weird
>Confusing to spell
>Mistaken for another gender
>Only one in the phone book
>Not listed on any off-the-shelf "personalised" merchandise
Do you find this a helpful thing? The gender confusion is sometimes
annoying, sometimes useful. Like when I was in highschool, and there was a
school exchange with another school from a long way away, a bunch of people
going from each school to the other, and being billetted with families
there. I was mistakenly assigned to be billetted by a girl, rather than a
boy, because they thought I must be a girl from my name. Initially
embarrassing, it turned out rather well...
When we registered Lochlainn's birth, Jodie and filled in our details as
mother and father; then we received a letter from BD&M, because of some
minor beaurocratic crud that needed clearing up. They wrote to me as the
mother, and Jodie as the father, even though we were clearly listed as the
other way round on the form.
I remember reading Edward deBono talking about intelligence as being like
owning a fast car; doesn't make you a good driver. Stuff like the above
shows that some people are just catching the bus.
Emlyn
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