First understanding of mortality

From: hal@finney.org
Date: Tue Dec 07 1999 - 10:17:13 MST


Thinking about Toy Story 2 and its presentation of issues regarding
mortality, I was reminded of my own feelings as a child when I first
realized that I would someday die.

I don't remember how old I was, somewhere around pre-school age, but I
still remember the sensation of shock and disbelief. Most children learn
the basic concepts of life and death while young, but to then realize that
they applies to yourself as well is something which, for me at least, came
suddenly and with tremendous impact. I had always had a sense of myself
as a growing, changing, improving being, with unlimited opportunities
ahead "when I grow up". To suddenly realize that there is a barrier,
a wall, a limit beyond which everything I am would be destroyed, was a
crushing blow.

My wife tells much the same story, that she can remember the feeling of
learning that she would die, and how horrified and frightened she was
when this understanding burst upon her.

Is this a universal phenomenon? Does everyone experience this as a
traumatic moment, after which you know that your days are numbered?

Hal



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