From: Clint O'Dell (clintodell@hotmail.com)
Date: Thu Sep 02 1999 - 12:23:31 MDT
Robert Bradbury wrote:
>Indifference is difficult to achieve I would agree. The
>two best techniques that I know about are "self-observational"
>meditation and the "Stop" technique developed (or at least
>used) by the Russian(?) mystic Gurdieff. I'm not sure
>the stop technique (where a teacher requests that the student
>"stop" and notice the thoughts passing through the mind)
>can work on oneself. It would seem to require an isolated
>part of the mind that can produce random interrupts.
These are the techniques I use to make my observations. I don't know who
Gurdieff is, I discovered it myself when I was about 11. That was the time
I truly comprehended what it meant to die. I knew for a fact then that
there was no heaven, hell, after-life, God, or gods. Before then I was
agnostic. Having no evidence, direct or indirect, and recognizing the
childish beliefs of my father and close relatives I just couldn't believe
what I was being told; so, I had to find out for myself. That is when I
became a philosopher and studied everything around me, finding my own
answers to questions. Around 12 or 13 I started exploring my own thoughts.
I noticed that my thoughts and memories usually 'triggered' other thoughts
and memories. I knew then that they must be related. Also, having been
institutionalized for 3 years I had a chance to study the minds of mentally
ill patients and the minds of mentally capable psychologist and
psychiatrist. While there I also learned about memory. I paid close
attention to the tests the doctors gave me and questioned my self why they
asked the questions they did and why were they constantly performing CAT
scans.
To this day all I know why is that there is something 'odd' about my brain.
I always thought these doctors were pretty stupid if they can only tell my
brain was 'odd' and couldn't tell me what made it odd.
I must have been part of some sort of experiment or something because they
wouldn't tell me a dam thing!
Anyways, there came a time when I had no emotions at all. Complete
indifference. That lasted a few months until they started pumping me with
all sorts of medication. But during that time is when I came across my most
important discoveries about myself. Those are what I'm trying to write
down, for the first time, in my posts. Some of the things I figured out I
can't remember very well. Like how 'free will' works.
When they finally let me go, I was a complete emotional idiot! I've been
working for 2 years now to rebuild myself. It took more than 2 years to
discover how stupid I had become. Entered a genius, exited a slightly above
average idiot.
But my point is, you can observe thoughts go through your mind, you just
can't think about them as they occur unless you develop a side (thread)
thought process. You can do that through practice. Start out trying to do
two simple math problems at once.
And yes, random interrupts would be necessary.
Any evidence for this as of yet? Anyone know?
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