From: John M Grigg (starman125@lycos.com)
Date: Sat Nov 04 2000 - 23:10:23 MST
Jeff,
Your riff on extropian action figures was absolutely hilarious and yet also very thoughtful. I just wanted to say what a huge kick I got out of it. I bet the people you mentioned also had a laugh or at least a smirk out of it. I had thought of doing something similar but not as good as what you came up with. I was simply going to spoof Saturday morning ads aimed at kids.
you wrote:
I would awaken to find myself in the greenhouse, beneath the
flowers, basking in Natasha's light, surrounded by lizard-fish, all of us throbbing contentedly. Anders meanwhile, would be over in the corner with the Buddha and the Max figure, the three of them surrounded by a halo of what I guess to be uplifted and by-now-very-bright microorganisms. Luckily, but logically, the 'Anders effect' is always benign.
(end)
This was one of my favorite parts. I would have also included a Den Otter figure though with an escape pod for when Eli gets out of control. And realistically the Robert Bradbury figure would have come with macroreplicator accessories to re-engineer the entire solar system. :)
This is an ad I would like to see for extropian action figures
Narrator says with thundering music in the background: Boys and girls! Stop the powers of statism with the new Heros of Extropianism action figures! Feel the power of dynamic optimism!
Boy one- Look out! It's Jeremy Rifkin and his flunkies and they're warping public opinion regarding genetic engineering! (Another boy is shown moving a Jeremy Rifkin figure back and forth in an aggressive manner)
Boy two- You're all to late! And you don't have the funding to ever match mine! Hah!
Boy one- Max More and Greg Burch will stop you! (He runs up with the Max and Greg figures in his hands which he waves in the air)
Boy one- Half-truths and fearmongering will not be sufficient to stop us in a public debate! Go Max and Greg!
Boy two- I'm in trouble! I better escape! Luckily, I have my Rifkin accessory bicycle! See you guys later! (puts Rifkin figure on bike and slowly moves away from others)
Girl one- You're not going anywhere! (waves her Natasha Vita-More figure in the air) Natasha has her primo 3M+ body and you're going to really get it!
Boy two- I give up! I know when I'm defeated!
Narrator: Those who would hold us back are defeated again thanks to Max, Greg and Natasha! Go to your closest retailer to take part in the fight! And coming soon, the orbital headquarters of the Extropy Institute with over twenty different lights and sound effects! For only $89.99! (Pounding music) Go extropians! Go!
Realistically though the real market out there is for young girls so we would come out with Barbie-like dolls known as the women of extropianism. Natasha, Gina, Queenemuse and others would have their likenesses in plastic. Extropic memes would be written all over their boxes and spoken when a button on the doll is pressed! Updated messages could be downloaded from their websites so young girls could really get the message.
John :)
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