From: spike66 (spike66@attbi.com)
Date: Fri Jun 21 2002 - 15:55:36 MDT
Olga Bourlin wrote:
> Unfortunately, you left out the part where I wrote about children
> being hurt - my primary concernis with them. Some children's feelings
> are easier to hurt than others, too, I suppose - but given the
> choice,why hurt the young and impressionable? (And, of course, not all
> adult people are as confident as you and I are, Spike.)
>
Thanks for the comments Olga. Of course I always want to
avoid hurting children's feelings.
They are too likely to respond with deadly force. {8^D
Consider the following news story, another in the category
of "Only in Taxifornia":
http://foxnews.com/story/0,2933,55836,00.html
SANTA MONICA--A Santa Monica elementary school has banned the game of
tag, once synonymous with youth and innocence, because they say it
creates self-esteem issues among weaker and slower children.
"We had some children who were not playing 'it' appropriately. How do
you differentiate between those that are playing correctly and those
that aren't?" asked Franklin Elementary School Principal Pat Samarge.
In the school's weekly newsletter, Samarge told parents that without
adult supervision, the game would be banned. The principal said children
playing tag suffered both physical and emotional injuries.
"Little kids were coming in and saying 'I don't like it.' [The] children
weren't feeling good about it," Samarge said.
Dr. Judy Young, executive director of the National Association for Sport
and Physical Education, disagreed with Samarge, saying that games like
tag "are organized to have a winner and a loser," which is simply a part
of life.
"Self-esteem should not be imbedded in whether you win or lose a game,"
Young said.
Tamara Silver, a parent of a fifth-grader at Franklin Elementary School,
said the school sent her two letters informing her of the new rules. The
second letter cited safety concerns, not issues of self-image, to
justify the tag ban.
"I want my child to know that he can have some freedom," Silver said. "I
want my child to know he can play. I want my child to know that he can
fall down and skin his knee."
(Oh my GOD! Junior might FALL, and SKIN his KNEE!)
I have been pondering something that is related to this
thread. We know of cases where a notion gets deeply
embedded in the psyche of a society that can profoundly
affect the character of that society. Even if the actual meme
is false, its spread can have a deep impact.
A notion which has become very widely accepted by
western society is that people who fail at life seem to share
the characteristic of low self esteem. Therefore perhaps if
we instill high self esteem in young people, they will not fail
at life. So we must eschew any kind of behavior that would
harm the delicate self esteem of the individual, particularly the
young. Let us FORCE high self esteem on the children, whether
they want it or not.
Is not this a pervasive notion today? How many examples
can you think of, in popular music, in modern literature, in
politics? Song lyrics: "I believe that children are our future,
teach them well and let them lead the way, yakka yakka all the
beauty they possess insiiiiiide, give them a sennnnnse of pride..."
Another example: DARE, that anti drug education thing.
Graduations, honors heaped upon those who manage to
survive adolescence without becoming hopeless junkies.
Message: never mind actual high school diplomas, kids,
just stay off of drugs, struggle to not become useless derelicts
by the time you reach voting age.
What if...
What if low self esteem really *isn't* the real problem at all?
What if it is rather a symptom of something else? All our
efforts to build self esteem in youth is treating the symptom,
putting a Band Aid over an infected appendix.
If we go about artificially creating self esteem in order to
prevent people from become addicts or losers, then that
self esteem will be flimsy indeed. Our egos will naturally
be delicate if our self esteem is not based on actual
accomplishments. For instance, I do not consider surviving
childhood without hallucinogen addiction as a great
accomplishment. A good thing, for sure, but not exactly
an admirable accomplishment.
Consider the tried and true training methods for new
soldiers. In boot camp the sergeants systematically
destroy the self esteem of the individual, reducing
it to unrecognizable rubble. Then they carefully
rebuild the ego based on one's ability to act as a
group, to follow orders, to be part of a team. The
individual is transformed by that. (Those who have
been thru boot camp, do feel free to comment.)
When the soldiers finish boot camp, their artificial
self esteem has been replaced by one that is based
on an actual accomplishment: enduring boot camp.
Even more so with those who earn advanced degrees.
They have a secure ego based on accomplishments.
Consider another angle: religion incorporated. Some
branches of christianity use a technique similar to that
employed by the military: they crush the ego of its clientele
based on anything other than the extent to which they
follow their church. Example: "...All our righteousness
is as filthy rags," but Hoerkheimer gave his life for you...etc.
Those who have college degrees, especially advanced
degrees, have real self esteem, based on actual
accomplishments. I applaud these. You may play
tag now.
Could it be that our society's obsession with political
correctness, with the unforgivable sin of name calling,
could all be a result of our deep down suspicion that
our self esteem has no basis? When we are given
honors for nothing, deep down inside we *know* we
have accomplished not one damn thing. The applause
is just noise, the accolades meaningless. The result is
the recipients of phony honors merely develop disdain
for the society that confers it, a deep cynicism towards
those that force hollow honors upon them.
We try so hard to level the playing field, to make sure
there are no losers, that we create a negative incentive
among youth to actually accomplish anything real. We are
thereby making all of them losers, in comparison to those
societies which do not indulge in such foibles, and are
thus raising up a generation of ass kicking WINNERS!
Mike what do you suppose boot camp would be like
if the sergeants were not allowed to harm the self esteem
of the recruits?
I suspect our society is seeing the results of what happens
when we artificially pumps the ego of its members. Perhaps
we should let the slower and weaker children be insulted, as
most of us were at that age. Perhaps they would be filled
with a grim resolve to compete on another field of play, a
different arena, one which actually counts, as in one that
carries actual dollar signs. Perhaps in so doing we will
create *real* winners which will annihilate the competition,
ritually slay the artificial "winners" on the battlefield of the
marketplace.
Viva la capitalism!
spike
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.1.5 : Sat Nov 02 2002 - 09:14:56 MST