From: Spike Jones (spike66@attglobal.net)
Date: Mon Feb 04 2002 - 21:52:13 MST
Do indulge me in a bit of cow humor. Someone sent these to
me, I added only the one about the extropians. {8-] spike
Subject: Fw: Fwd: Fw: Corporate cows
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the
milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.
A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size
of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create
clever cow cartoon images called cowkimon and market them
World-Wide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years,
eat once a month, and milk themselves.
An EXTROPIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows. You read their DNA and figure out a way to
create lean beef directly in a vat. You upload your cows. You debate
endlessly on what to do with the originals cows, which are still alive
and well, and are demanding bovine rights.
A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows. Both are mad.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for
lunch.
A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You
count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again
and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another
bottle of vodka.
A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others
for storing them.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows. You worship them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full
employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who
reported the numbers.
AN ISRAELI CORPORATION
So, there are these two Jewish cows, right? They open a milk
factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights. They send
their
calves to Harvard to become doctors. So, who needs people?
AN ARKANSAS CORPORATION
You have two cows. That one on the left is kinda cute...
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