From: Spike Jones (spike66@attglobal.net)
Date: Sun Feb 11 2001 - 18:08:10 MST
Warning, nonextropian silliness follows. Brace yourself for
the next Taxifornia export...
> Californians have a
> very nasty habit of exporting their problems to Washington
> (First it was traffic, now its energy shortages. I wonder
> what it will be next?).
Brace yourself Robert. The next thing coming your way is...
Sound of Music singalongs. In San Francisco, down in the
Castro district, they are having Sound of Music on the big screen,
with a dress-up audience participation singalong kinda like
Rocky Horror Picture Show, only with faux nuns, complete
with curlers under their wimples. Of course, no one who is
not a nun has a clue what a wimple is, however there are
plenty of guys in pink and white trying to dress up as one.
The guest star is Charmian Carr who played that babe-alicious
eldest daughter Leisl. Shes 58 going on 59, and *still* truly
dazzling after all these years. Rumor has it that she will come
dressed up in a dominatrix outfit. Dry this time.
Nowthen, this all sounded like a hoot, so I talked my wife
into going, but so far havent convinced her to be seen
with me in the costume I proposed.
Oh, yes, the costume contest. The "Sisters" of Perpetual
Motion showed up, one of which is said to be an actual
woman, but no one knows which.
A woman in a white dress had every favorite thing physically
attached to her person: door bells and sleigh bells, wild geese,
cream colored ponies, even schnitzel with noodles.
A group of men and women dressed in curtains.
A man in pink piegnoir, white boa, disheveled platinum
wig, fuzzy slippers, carrying a cane and an empty liquor
bottle. He was the baroness 20 yrs after being dumped
by the Captain.
Friday's winner, a woman in olive drab with black balloons
attached to her head and shoulders. Her character:
the lonely goat turd.
So I was in the costume shop and they had an SNL
conehead thing, and I got an idea. Take some pine
cones, cut off the, um, thingies that pine cones have
on em, put on the conehead getup and glue these thingies
all over it and all over my face. Hang a sign around
my neck with arrows pointing upwards and the words
^ MARIA SIT HERE ^
So far the negotiation is more or less at a standstill
as Shelly is just a wee bit on the square side of hip.
She agrees to go as Maria but refuses to be seen with
me should I go down to the SF gay district dressed as
that silly pine cone.
Too bad too, for it would surely win the contest.
So bad news, all you innocents outside of Taxifornia.
The Sound of Music singalong is coming...
{8^D spike
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