biblical humor alert

From: Spike Jones (spike66@ibm.net)
Date: Thu Jan 06 2000 - 20:50:44 MST


> EvMick wrote: >and the lazy ass spoke to him....
>
> Rick Strongitharm wrote: It was Balaam, the old testament prophet who had
> intercourse, oral..er..verbal, with his ass, his OWN ass no less.

This was quite a trick, but not as great as that of Moses, who
tied his ass to a tree, then walked on ten furlongs. {8^D

> Elijah or ..sha, I can't remember
> which, righteously caused a bear to attack and kill a bunch of children...

That was Elisha. II Kings 2:23. But he got laid anyway. Verse 25 says:
"And he went from thence to mount Carmel..."

> ...Elisha or ...ja, I can't
> remember which, was fed by ravens during a famine.

Elijah. I Kings 17:6. He also got laid a couple verses later: V. 9: [God
said to him] "Arise get thee to Zarephath...behold, I have commanded
a widow woman there to sustain thee..."

But Elijah couldn't get enough. In verse 19: "He said unto her [the widow],
Give me thy son. And he took him out of her bosom and carried him
up into a loft, where he abode, and laid him upon his own bed."

> I should get off my lazy ass and look up the Biblical references for the
> above, but I don't find any pleasure or benefit or redeeming quality in time
> spent in a place that consumed too much of me, already...

Me too, Rick, me too. {8-| spike



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